Monday, February 20, 2006

Clarifications and Obfuscations

Reader beware! I’m entering the dangerous territory of telling you things I think might clarify my past and future posts. Please consider items that enlighten or inform. Please ignore items that obfuscate or distract.

The fine print: I’m always open to challenges and / or questions at any time about anything. The items below are based solely on my experience and beliefs. They are not intended as pronouncements of what is proper or right for anyone else. These are current as of today only and are subject to change at any time without prior notice. Cash value $.008.

That being said, here we go:


  • I want to stay married to my wife.
  • I question that decision every day.
  • I’m slowly learning to be confident in my own beliefs without feeling the need to make anyone agree with me. The blog world is helping me with that.
  • I believe being bisexual is possible and sometimes that’s how I define myself.
  • I believe sexual preferences can be fluid throughout a day, week, month, year or lifetime.
  • My preferred term for myself is “queer” and I don’t mean it in a pejorative way.
  • I’m wrong more often than I’m right and am lucky to realize that now.
  • I’m an attention whore and I blog to both fulfill and fight that need.
  • I love to make people laugh.
  • I believe in a power greater than myself that I sometimes call God or my Higher Power (HP).
  • My concept of my HP is fluid.
  • Courtesy of Hypoxic I currently imagine my HP looks and acts like Willie Nelson.
  • When God speaks to me directly I don’t listen because the voice sounds too much like my own.
  • I do try to listen for God speaking to me through other people and events in the world around me.
  • Seeing a shrink and studying Carl Jung’s theories on my own are helping me understand myself better.
  • I’m currently most interested in Jung's theory of synchronicity and how this relates to my concept of God.
  • I pray every day and believe in the power of prayer.
  • Two years ago I would have dismissed anyone who prays as a crackpot.
  • I’m not aligned with any religion, but if and when it happens I will begin with Liberal Quakerism.
  • St. Francis of Assisi is my hero.
  • My mental and emotional stability are dependent (among other things) upon: following the suggestions of Alcoholics Anonymous, my AA inspired spiritual beliefs including my HP, psychotherapy, psychotropic drugs, my family, my friends (including you), blogging, my dog and my job. Sometimes I’m resentful and/or ashamed that I need so much help, but usually I’m grateful that I have it.
  • I am and always have been an aviation geek.
  • When I start to question the existence of magic in the world I look at a picture of a 747 lifting off the ground.
  • This quote from page 552 in Alcoholics Anonymous akaThe Big Book summarizes my current goal in life: “The only real freedom a human being can ever know is doing what you ought to do because you want to do it.”

That’s more than enough for now.

Thanks for sticking with me. Feedback is welcome.

Have a great day!

Flip

6 comments:

Tom said...

A great manifesto. I especially love the warning about mistaking our own voice for God's--probably the most commonly made error on the planet today, and the source of all our really big problems.

One note: attention whore = human being. Have you found one yet who isn't?

I'm very glad that I have met you on the cyberplane.

Anthony said...

Flip's declaration of self. I admire your courage here my friend. A stunning and thought provoking post.

There is no shame in needing help.
There is huge courage in admitting it and even more so asking for it. Well done.

Spider said...

That was on hell of a post flip... you are truly a man to be admired.

Flip said...

Thanks for the feedback. I am so grateful to have you guys and other blog friends in my life. Take care.

D said...

This is a great list. It takes courage to truly embrace yourself.

And I agree with tom that everyone wants the attention of others -- it let's you know that people care about you.

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